We all have been through some rough times, but one of the hardest is when you lose a friend that is close to you. Be it death or their choice that they just don't want to be friends anymore, it's still a sensitive topic, and can be very hard, especially if you don't see it coming.
The first thing I would recommend, is learning to deal with the loss. If they have died, think of all the times you were together and had fun, and treasure those memories. If they have just left, it may help to think of the positives to their leaving. For example, they always lied to you, or they didn't consider your feelings.
After you've coped with the loss, keep your mind clear of them. If you continue to think about them during important times, it may fog up your mind and make it impossible to focus on the task at hand. This step is very important, especially if you feel a bit of anger toward the person. Nobody can do things quite the same while angry as if they were happy while completing the assignment. If you encounter the friend again after they have left you, consider your options; you could nod a hello to them to acknowledge their existence, or you could ignore them and go about your merry way without them. If your friend has passed away, no matter how hard it is for me to say this, but I'm sorry... they will never come back. However, you always have them with you in their memories and your heart. Carry on your life for them, and think about the fun times you had together when you miss them. In these cases of your loss, there's nothing wrong with crying from time to time. It will help you release stress and you'll feel much better after getting your emotions out. However, if you feel sad for a longer amount of time then you should (example: no longer being friends, a week or two, or a death of a friend, more than a year) you may be experiencing depression. If you feel you've become depressed after a loss, ask for help as soon as possible.
We all go through those days where we wake up and realize "wait.. I'm not friends with them anymore.." and feel a little guilt, but it's not your fault. If they didn't like your personality, then that's their loss, not yours. Just remember that you'll always have your memories, and no matter what, don't change yourself for someone else.
discover a new talent
Monday, October 10, 2011
Sunday, October 2, 2011
First issue, talking behind someone's back
Hello~ welcome to my first blog post~. I don't really feel it's a good time to introduce myself, so I'll just jump right in.
First, we're going to discuss one common problem with people of all ages; talking behind your back.
The first thing I'd like to cover is that whatever they say, do not let it change your opinion of yourself, no matter how harsh they were being. No one should ever make you change your opinion of how you are, just because they said something that may make you feel like you don't belong.
At this point, you have two choices of what you can do. You can either ignore it, and go your own way from that person, or you can confront them and tell them to stop. Most people, at this stage would ignore it, and there's nothing wrong with that. Eventually people will stop talking about you and move onto different things, then everyone will forget what happened after a short while. Everyone matures in time, after all. But if you choose to confront the person, be very careful. One thing that should be avoided is creating a rivalry. Rivalries can lead to only giving you more stress and anger than was originally anticipated. Talk things through carefully with your "attacker" and make sure to remain calm during confrontation. If you loose your cool, and go off on a blind fury, then they'll just have more rumors to spread about you. Explain how you feel to them when they're alone. When they're in a group they may be more prone to joking with their friends and making you feel worse. If they continue to talk about you after you talked to them, tell someone who can help you get them to stop. If that doesn't work either, they should stop soon enough.
things will always get better in time, and you can always look forward to tomorrow. Don't loose hope, and be sure to hang in there~
First, we're going to discuss one common problem with people of all ages; talking behind your back.
The first thing I'd like to cover is that whatever they say, do not let it change your opinion of yourself, no matter how harsh they were being. No one should ever make you change your opinion of how you are, just because they said something that may make you feel like you don't belong.
At this point, you have two choices of what you can do. You can either ignore it, and go your own way from that person, or you can confront them and tell them to stop. Most people, at this stage would ignore it, and there's nothing wrong with that. Eventually people will stop talking about you and move onto different things, then everyone will forget what happened after a short while. Everyone matures in time, after all. But if you choose to confront the person, be very careful. One thing that should be avoided is creating a rivalry. Rivalries can lead to only giving you more stress and anger than was originally anticipated. Talk things through carefully with your "attacker" and make sure to remain calm during confrontation. If you loose your cool, and go off on a blind fury, then they'll just have more rumors to spread about you. Explain how you feel to them when they're alone. When they're in a group they may be more prone to joking with their friends and making you feel worse. If they continue to talk about you after you talked to them, tell someone who can help you get them to stop. If that doesn't work either, they should stop soon enough.
things will always get better in time, and you can always look forward to tomorrow. Don't loose hope, and be sure to hang in there~
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)